Monday, May 31, 2004
Sunday, May 30, 2004
i just concocted a kind of dessert frittata: two eggs with a bit of milk, a sploosh of vanilla and just a teaspoon of sugar. also, a pinch of salt. beaten, fried with butter, then topped with brie, sliced strawberries and sliced avocado. just a sprinkling of cinnamon and a drizzle of maple syrup.
it was yummy, but i think i'll put the brie on the side next time. it's really good with the strawberries, but only so-so with the avocado. also, if i had fresh cracked pepper, that would have been better.
my meal was kind of backwards, so i'm off to dig in on some leftover garlic mashed potatoes.
it was yummy, but i think i'll put the brie on the side next time. it's really good with the strawberries, but only so-so with the avocado. also, if i had fresh cracked pepper, that would have been better.
my meal was kind of backwards, so i'm off to dig in on some leftover garlic mashed potatoes.
Saturday, May 29, 2004
financial planners should really warn their clients that they should set aside at least two per cent of their income for weddings.
not their own. weddings of others.
not that i've ever been to a financial planner, but if i had, and i had not been adequately warned that i would see my savings depleted as a results of the planned nuptials of my friends and acquaintances, i would deem that planner very much in derelict of his or her duties.
so far, we've been invited to a wedding a year for the past four. i know it's only going to pick up. the first wedding we attended had us fly from ottawa to edmonton and back. i was glad to go (at first), but it ended up, in retrospect, being one of the lamest weddings i've ever been to. my sweetie and i knew nobody except for the bride and groom, and i was seriously the only non-white person there. my sweetie and i were the only people there who weren't christians -- which was, yes, very much emphasized -- and the bride and groom took off shortly after 10pm. um, weak?
the year after that saw me fly from vancouver to edmonton for SC & MN's wedding. i went alone, but it was a chance to catch up with some of my old friends.
last year was TD's 'wedding,' which got unceremoniously cancelled after we'd booked our non-refundable plane tickets with jetsgo. jetsgo! the discount carrier that doesn't actually fly anywhere useful! the cash we dropped on those tix would be transferred to a credit that had to be used within a year, but jetsgo doesn't fly vancouver to edmonton or vancouver to calgary. more on this later.
this past christmas, we were at JS & BM's wedding, which was a blast. it didn't really cost us anything 'cause we were heading home anyway, and they didn't want any gifts. it was a slumber party wedding, so the bride and groom actually stayed the whole night at the hall with their guests, and it was just a great party. except for the dog shit and stomach flu. but i won't get into that.
now, we have to fly to ontario for S&A's wedding. i love them and am glad to go, but shit, is travelling to weddings ever taking a financial toll. fortunately, jetsgo does fly vancouver to toronto, so it was an opportunity to use up the credits. the wedding itself isn't until november, well past the year we were allotted to make use of the jetsgo credits, but i could at least book it before the year was up. if S&A cancel their wedding (unlikely, yes) we'd be shafted out of over a thousand beans.
i'm also sort of worried that it'll be kind of like M&L's wedding in that we won't know anyone there and that it'll be overrun with sanctimony...
fortunately, we haven't yet been invited to a wedding by people we didn't really know or like. it pisses me off when people invite those who can only ostensibly be considered acquaintances to their lavish self-indulgent ceremonies just to milk gifts.
anyway, my ultimate point is: the two of us spent about $800 plus gifts ($75) to fly to M&L's wedding in 2001, i spent about $250 plus gifts ($75) for S&M's wedding, just $100 in a food bank donation for J&B's wedding (though my sweetie ended up paying a much higher price with two days of non-stop vomitting), the equivalent of $1025 for airline tix and likely about $100 in gifts for S&A's wedding...which means that so far, we have spent more money travelling to and from and getting gifts for weddings than we spent on our own wedding and honeymoon.
whether that's more a commentary on our friends or an indictment of us is for you to decide...
not their own. weddings of others.
not that i've ever been to a financial planner, but if i had, and i had not been adequately warned that i would see my savings depleted as a results of the planned nuptials of my friends and acquaintances, i would deem that planner very much in derelict of his or her duties.
so far, we've been invited to a wedding a year for the past four. i know it's only going to pick up. the first wedding we attended had us fly from ottawa to edmonton and back. i was glad to go (at first), but it ended up, in retrospect, being one of the lamest weddings i've ever been to. my sweetie and i knew nobody except for the bride and groom, and i was seriously the only non-white person there. my sweetie and i were the only people there who weren't christians -- which was, yes, very much emphasized -- and the bride and groom took off shortly after 10pm. um, weak?
the year after that saw me fly from vancouver to edmonton for SC & MN's wedding. i went alone, but it was a chance to catch up with some of my old friends.
last year was TD's 'wedding,' which got unceremoniously cancelled after we'd booked our non-refundable plane tickets with jetsgo. jetsgo! the discount carrier that doesn't actually fly anywhere useful! the cash we dropped on those tix would be transferred to a credit that had to be used within a year, but jetsgo doesn't fly vancouver to edmonton or vancouver to calgary. more on this later.
this past christmas, we were at JS & BM's wedding, which was a blast. it didn't really cost us anything 'cause we were heading home anyway, and they didn't want any gifts. it was a slumber party wedding, so the bride and groom actually stayed the whole night at the hall with their guests, and it was just a great party. except for the dog shit and stomach flu. but i won't get into that.
now, we have to fly to ontario for S&A's wedding. i love them and am glad to go, but shit, is travelling to weddings ever taking a financial toll. fortunately, jetsgo does fly vancouver to toronto, so it was an opportunity to use up the credits. the wedding itself isn't until november, well past the year we were allotted to make use of the jetsgo credits, but i could at least book it before the year was up. if S&A cancel their wedding (unlikely, yes) we'd be shafted out of over a thousand beans.
i'm also sort of worried that it'll be kind of like M&L's wedding in that we won't know anyone there and that it'll be overrun with sanctimony...
fortunately, we haven't yet been invited to a wedding by people we didn't really know or like. it pisses me off when people invite those who can only ostensibly be considered acquaintances to their lavish self-indulgent ceremonies just to milk gifts.
anyway, my ultimate point is: the two of us spent about $800 plus gifts ($75) to fly to M&L's wedding in 2001, i spent about $250 plus gifts ($75) for S&M's wedding, just $100 in a food bank donation for J&B's wedding (though my sweetie ended up paying a much higher price with two days of non-stop vomitting), the equivalent of $1025 for airline tix and likely about $100 in gifts for S&A's wedding...which means that so far, we have spent more money travelling to and from and getting gifts for weddings than we spent on our own wedding and honeymoon.
whether that's more a commentary on our friends or an indictment of us is for you to decide...
Tuesday, May 25, 2004
Monday, May 24, 2004
Sunday, May 23, 2004
MOMpop!
wheeee!
just came home from hanging out in the sun all day making hemp jewellery.
can't complain about that!
stupidly, though, i wore somewhat of a high-rise shirt and now i have an odd-shaped back-patch tan/burn. yay for melanoma!
the first MOMpop was pretty decent. HT came and sat with us a while, which was cool. nobody else i knew showed up, though. fuckers. i showed a little girl how to make a macrame dragonfly. my sweetie said she reminded him of lilo, from lilo and stitch. her mom seemed pretty pleased with the whole scene and even offered to pay me. i couldn't always understand what the girl was saying, though. and i felt silly asking her to repeat things all the time. i can't understand a lot of what some kids say because they kind of yell out the words and don't really enunciate. their parents seem to be able to understand them just fine, but i can't help wondering what i'd do if i had a kid who spewed supposedly meaningful syllables that i couldn't comprehend.
i've discovered today, too, that i have essentially zero appreciation for the diversity of most electronic dance music. i mean, i don't mind it, but i just can't really tell different songs apart. i can tell they're supposed to be different, but i can't grasp or appreciate preferring one piece over another, you know. SP, an acquaintance of ours, came and chatted with us for a bit and then said, 'i love this song. i just have to go dance to it.'
fair enough. to me, though, i don't really understand how you could love that particular song and not the slew of others that had been previously played.
i guess i'm barbarically uncultured. *shrug*.
so we biked to the event and biked back. i'm out of shape. man, i'm gonna be sore tomorrow...
...
fire update: it looks like the fire in the apartment started in the laundry room. i assume the plumbers who were doing the water maintenance were soldering something and lit it on fire or something. anyway, a big chunk of the wall is missing, where the firefighters hacked away at it. the suite next to the laundry room was collateral damage and the whole area is charred. i feel really bad for the residents whose suite is currently open for people of all sorts to peer into. i hope they get their place fixed up shortly.
my sweetie is still bitter that the strata council wouldn't let him weld with oxy-acetylene on our porch. he maintains that he would never have started a fire...
anyway, looks like laundromat for us next week!
wheeee!
just came home from hanging out in the sun all day making hemp jewellery.
can't complain about that!
stupidly, though, i wore somewhat of a high-rise shirt and now i have an odd-shaped back-patch tan/burn. yay for melanoma!
the first MOMpop was pretty decent. HT came and sat with us a while, which was cool. nobody else i knew showed up, though. fuckers. i showed a little girl how to make a macrame dragonfly. my sweetie said she reminded him of lilo, from lilo and stitch. her mom seemed pretty pleased with the whole scene and even offered to pay me. i couldn't always understand what the girl was saying, though. and i felt silly asking her to repeat things all the time. i can't understand a lot of what some kids say because they kind of yell out the words and don't really enunciate. their parents seem to be able to understand them just fine, but i can't help wondering what i'd do if i had a kid who spewed supposedly meaningful syllables that i couldn't comprehend.
i've discovered today, too, that i have essentially zero appreciation for the diversity of most electronic dance music. i mean, i don't mind it, but i just can't really tell different songs apart. i can tell they're supposed to be different, but i can't grasp or appreciate preferring one piece over another, you know. SP, an acquaintance of ours, came and chatted with us for a bit and then said, 'i love this song. i just have to go dance to it.'
fair enough. to me, though, i don't really understand how you could love that particular song and not the slew of others that had been previously played.
i guess i'm barbarically uncultured. *shrug*.
so we biked to the event and biked back. i'm out of shape. man, i'm gonna be sore tomorrow...
...
fire update: it looks like the fire in the apartment started in the laundry room. i assume the plumbers who were doing the water maintenance were soldering something and lit it on fire or something. anyway, a big chunk of the wall is missing, where the firefighters hacked away at it. the suite next to the laundry room was collateral damage and the whole area is charred. i feel really bad for the residents whose suite is currently open for people of all sorts to peer into. i hope they get their place fixed up shortly.
my sweetie is still bitter that the strata council wouldn't let him weld with oxy-acetylene on our porch. he maintains that he would never have started a fire...
anyway, looks like laundromat for us next week!
Thursday, May 20, 2004
so much for my much-needed nap.
uh, there was a fire in the building about half an hour ago. i was roused from drowsiness by an alarm bell. assuming it was just a false alarm, i slipped out of the apartment with my wallet and keys and exploited the occasion to head over to the market and get some organic strawberries (incidentally, $5 for almost a kilogram -- what a steal!). when i left the building, there wasn't even anyone outside.
i came back to three fire trucks, a small crowd of confused residents and about a half-dozen firefighters putting fans in the doorways to draw out the smoke.
they let us back in about three minutes ago. it looks like maybe it started in the laundry room or one of the other suites in the far end of the building.
i'll find out more later. now, i eat a strawberry and get back to sleep.
uh, there was a fire in the building about half an hour ago. i was roused from drowsiness by an alarm bell. assuming it was just a false alarm, i slipped out of the apartment with my wallet and keys and exploited the occasion to head over to the market and get some organic strawberries (incidentally, $5 for almost a kilogram -- what a steal!). when i left the building, there wasn't even anyone outside.
i came back to three fire trucks, a small crowd of confused residents and about a half-dozen firefighters putting fans in the doorways to draw out the smoke.
they let us back in about three minutes ago. it looks like maybe it started in the laundry room or one of the other suites in the far end of the building.
i'll find out more later. now, i eat a strawberry and get back to sleep.
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Sunday, May 16, 2004
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
ew!
source of the unidentified smell: discovered.
my sweetie had apparently 'forgotten about' this cup of garlic cloves with a bit of water that he'd placed between the blinds and the window he was trying to coax into sprouting a few weeks ago.
it had, as you might imagine, long since given up on becoming anything alive and was decaying. there was a thick crust of something covering the top, which had actually sealed off much of the smell, which explained why the stench wasn't getting any stronger.
i'd been trying to convince him for days that the smell was still there and that i could smell it from the couch and not from the kitchen.
he did not believe me.
now he does.
rest assured, then, smorg and gerry (and possibly thomas later on), that the smell has been identified and thoroughly, thoroughly erradicated and your visit will not be compromised by rotting garlic.
ew!
source of the unidentified smell: discovered.
my sweetie had apparently 'forgotten about' this cup of garlic cloves with a bit of water that he'd placed between the blinds and the window he was trying to coax into sprouting a few weeks ago.
it had, as you might imagine, long since given up on becoming anything alive and was decaying. there was a thick crust of something covering the top, which had actually sealed off much of the smell, which explained why the stench wasn't getting any stronger.
i'd been trying to convince him for days that the smell was still there and that i could smell it from the couch and not from the kitchen.
he did not believe me.
now he does.
rest assured, then, smorg and gerry (and possibly thomas later on), that the smell has been identified and thoroughly, thoroughly erradicated and your visit will not be compromised by rotting garlic.
i must have walked by this jamaican eatery on fourth avenue a hundred times.
'i should try their roti and jerk chicken sometime,' i think, every single time.
yesterday, i walked by the place on my way to the bus stop to discover it's become a yuppie juice bar.
i highly doubt that some massive 'i should start being more impulsive and live for the moment' epiphany will come of this, but i am quite, quite sorry that i missed out on the opportunity.
let's try to temper that with some sour grapes, shall we? 'well, if they went under, their food couldn't have been that good...'
'i should try their roti and jerk chicken sometime,' i think, every single time.
yesterday, i walked by the place on my way to the bus stop to discover it's become a yuppie juice bar.
i highly doubt that some massive 'i should start being more impulsive and live for the moment' epiphany will come of this, but i am quite, quite sorry that i missed out on the opportunity.
let's try to temper that with some sour grapes, shall we? 'well, if they went under, their food couldn't have been that good...'
that all-nighter, not surprisingly, completely fucked up my internal clock.
...
i procured a bunch of painted wooden beads and some hemp twine, both natural and black on friday. over the next week, i'm gonna try a few knotting techniques that i learned years and years ago. the hemp twine is really quite uneven, though. the bracelet i made myself on friday is incredibly lumpy. also, i had to roll it quite a bit before it became maleable, so it looks really worn and fuzzy.
it's hemp jewellery, though, i guess. it's supposed to be rustic?
i just wanna make sure i figure out exactly what i'll need to bring to the MOMpop next sunday. scissors, obviously. masking tape? maybe. little pieces of cardboard to serve as shitty impromptu cork boards? thumbtacks.
the event's supposed to be really casual and spontaneous, but i'm getting inexplicably excited and nervous about it. i haven't made hemp jewellery in years, and i get the brilliant idea that i'm gonna teach kids how to do it, now? hmm...
...
we (HT, MM, HP, S&A and my sweetie) went to see carolyn mark on friday. the show was great, but way too short. i was kinda expecting her to play more than one set... i got her new album, which came with an 'ask me about carolyn mark!' button and a bag of 'beaver-flavoured chips.'
the album is absolutely amazing. i wish i had her voice -- my god, it's so rich and gorgeous.
we were debating whether the best thing to do is eat the beaver-flavoured chips and just keep the bag, or not eat the chips at all and keep the whole thing intact.
...
the more S&A talk about their wedding plans -- taking ballroom dancing lessons so they can have a decent first dance, hiring DJs, getting dresses, finding photographers...ugh -- the more i am so, so glad that we never went through all of that shit. i mean, i understand that all of this is important to them, but i can't help but feel that there must be a better use of their time.
...
i procured a bunch of painted wooden beads and some hemp twine, both natural and black on friday. over the next week, i'm gonna try a few knotting techniques that i learned years and years ago. the hemp twine is really quite uneven, though. the bracelet i made myself on friday is incredibly lumpy. also, i had to roll it quite a bit before it became maleable, so it looks really worn and fuzzy.
it's hemp jewellery, though, i guess. it's supposed to be rustic?
i just wanna make sure i figure out exactly what i'll need to bring to the MOMpop next sunday. scissors, obviously. masking tape? maybe. little pieces of cardboard to serve as shitty impromptu cork boards? thumbtacks.
the event's supposed to be really casual and spontaneous, but i'm getting inexplicably excited and nervous about it. i haven't made hemp jewellery in years, and i get the brilliant idea that i'm gonna teach kids how to do it, now? hmm...
...
we (HT, MM, HP, S&A and my sweetie) went to see carolyn mark on friday. the show was great, but way too short. i was kinda expecting her to play more than one set... i got her new album, which came with an 'ask me about carolyn mark!' button and a bag of 'beaver-flavoured chips.'
the album is absolutely amazing. i wish i had her voice -- my god, it's so rich and gorgeous.
we were debating whether the best thing to do is eat the beaver-flavoured chips and just keep the bag, or not eat the chips at all and keep the whole thing intact.
...
the more S&A talk about their wedding plans -- taking ballroom dancing lessons so they can have a decent first dance, hiring DJs, getting dresses, finding photographers...ugh -- the more i am so, so glad that we never went through all of that shit. i mean, i understand that all of this is important to them, but i can't help but feel that there must be a better use of their time.
Friday, May 14, 2004
1:39 am: still in lab. listening to the ramones' mondo bizarro. all of the lyrics speak to me right now. in particular:
"this is the job that ate my brain..."
"i've got the strength to endure..."
"it's gonna be alright. it's gonna be okay..."
getting a bit hungry. i have ginger cookies and pecan butter tarts in the lab, but don't particularly feel like eating either. want something savoury. wish i'd brought some mini-babybels. they have cheddar mini-babybels now. eww.
finding different ways to avoid figuring out spectral normalization ranges.
stuck here for the long haul, 'cause there's no bus that runs home anymore.
i wonder how long i can keep this up.
it really isn't all that late for me -- i usually don't go to bed until about 2, but i'm so fuckin' tired right now.
uh, hmm. want to know where i can get some decent hemp string. could make hemp jewellery for the first MOMpop. macrame dragonflies are cool and kid-friendly...
1:52 am: got a lozenge for my throat.
2:21 am: just finished looking at normalization ranges for my spectra. realized that i wasted a shitload of time following the boss's orders when i could have taken fewer scans. batteries in my flashlight dying. saying 'screw it' to laser goggles. only putting them on when aligning.
so fucking tired.
(incidentally, this isn't updated in real-time because i only have
netscape on this computer and the new blogger interface is still kind of fucked up.)
been using the mouse so much my index finger actually smarts. using middle finger as crutch.
missed supersize me tonight. will try to catch it in the coming weeks.
3:58 am: still taking scans. paul simon is saving my sanity. i have the doors here, too, but i think they might lull me to sleep. i'm doing okay, actually. we'll see what happens when i hit the inevitable wall. my spectra look strange, though. *shrug*. first bus out of here leaves at 5:47. i don't even know if i'll be done by then.
if you'll be my bodyguard, i can be your long-lost pal...
4:11 am: ate two stale ginger cookies.
need water.
4:24 am: wishing i'd brought a blanket or something.
4:37 am: eating a bag of vending machine hickory sticks. probably not the best for my throat. glad it's not raining. would i ever be in a shitty mood if i had to go home cold and wet in the morning.
5:05 am: outlasted DA. wow.
heeheeheeheehee...at the giddy stage of exhaustion.
5:37 am: just missed the first bus leaving campus with 6 scans to go. briefly left the lab to discover that it's completely light out.
6:07 am: one scan left...!
6:20 am: done. everything's turned off. files are uploading. just have to get sample back into the cleanroom.
6:43 am: wrote e-mail to supervisor. trying to publish this entry but blogger page is unhappy. try again later. ready to go home.
"this is the job that ate my brain..."
"i've got the strength to endure..."
"it's gonna be alright. it's gonna be okay..."
getting a bit hungry. i have ginger cookies and pecan butter tarts in the lab, but don't particularly feel like eating either. want something savoury. wish i'd brought some mini-babybels. they have cheddar mini-babybels now. eww.
finding different ways to avoid figuring out spectral normalization ranges.
stuck here for the long haul, 'cause there's no bus that runs home anymore.
i wonder how long i can keep this up.
it really isn't all that late for me -- i usually don't go to bed until about 2, but i'm so fuckin' tired right now.
uh, hmm. want to know where i can get some decent hemp string. could make hemp jewellery for the first MOMpop. macrame dragonflies are cool and kid-friendly...
1:52 am: got a lozenge for my throat.
2:21 am: just finished looking at normalization ranges for my spectra. realized that i wasted a shitload of time following the boss's orders when i could have taken fewer scans. batteries in my flashlight dying. saying 'screw it' to laser goggles. only putting them on when aligning.
so fucking tired.
(incidentally, this isn't updated in real-time because i only have
netscape on this computer and the new blogger interface is still kind of fucked up.)
been using the mouse so much my index finger actually smarts. using middle finger as crutch.
missed supersize me tonight. will try to catch it in the coming weeks.
3:58 am: still taking scans. paul simon is saving my sanity. i have the doors here, too, but i think they might lull me to sleep. i'm doing okay, actually. we'll see what happens when i hit the inevitable wall. my spectra look strange, though. *shrug*. first bus out of here leaves at 5:47. i don't even know if i'll be done by then.
if you'll be my bodyguard, i can be your long-lost pal...
4:11 am: ate two stale ginger cookies.
need water.
4:24 am: wishing i'd brought a blanket or something.
4:37 am: eating a bag of vending machine hickory sticks. probably not the best for my throat. glad it's not raining. would i ever be in a shitty mood if i had to go home cold and wet in the morning.
5:05 am: outlasted DA. wow.
heeheeheeheehee...at the giddy stage of exhaustion.
5:37 am: just missed the first bus leaving campus with 6 scans to go. briefly left the lab to discover that it's completely light out.
6:07 am: one scan left...!
6:20 am: done. everything's turned off. files are uploading. just have to get sample back into the cleanroom.
6:43 am: wrote e-mail to supervisor. trying to publish this entry but blogger page is unhappy. try again later. ready to go home.
Thursday, May 13, 2004
today's crossword on yahoo games was disappointingly straightforward. i'd expected it to occupy my time while i was imaging my arrays, but now i find myself idle.
...
while staring at the massive grease spot that a dropped left-over shanghai noodle has imprinted upon my napkin, it occurred to me that it was kind of remarkable that the fortunes in fortune cookies didn't come out greased up and transclucent. i speculated that maybe the cookies didn't really have all that much grease in them -- that they were made entirely of, like, cornstarch and water -- which would explain why they're always flavourless and bone dry.
i consulted the great oracle of google to find this recipe for fortune cookies (which, like chop suey, was an american creation -- from some dude in LA, for crap's sake):
1 large egg
1/4 cup sugar
2 Tbsp. vegetable oil
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 to 2 Tbsp of water
Beat egg slightly. Add sugar and beat until very thick and smooth. Add oil to mixture. Add water and a little of the egg mixture to the cornstarch and stir until smooth; beat into egg mixture. Heat griddle to about 350 degrees. Drop a heaping teaspoonful of batter into the griddle. Then spread with a spoon into a cookie about 3 inches in diameter an d about 1/8 inch thick. Turn over to brown underside. Cook until cookies are light golden in color and lifts easily from the pan. Remove cookies one at a time from the griddle. Place a fortune paper in the center of the cookie and fold the cookie in half, pinching the edges together and folding down.
2 tablespoons of oil! i use that much to bake a batch of a dozen muffins which routinely leave grease spots on their muffin cups, and 1/4 cup cornstarch can't make that many fortune cookies.
anyway, when was it, exactly, when fortune cookies (more aptly called sweeping advice cookies or mangled proverb cookies) started including tacky lottery numbers? i'd venture to guess some time in the last ten years, 'cause i certainly don't remember them from my childhood.
i don't really understand the point, frankly. was there a marketing blitz that changed the landscape of fortune-cookie-dom forever? when one rogue manufacturer started offering new, improved cookies, 'now with lottery numbers!' to chinese and pseudochinese restauranteurs and all of its competitors had to follow suit? isn't not like regular folks regularly go out and buy fortune cookies to snack on.
cookie fortunes aren't meant to be taken seriously, of course -- although (digression) there was an awesome researcher at the national research council in ottawa, margaret, who was otherwise incredibly smart, witty and just plain cool, but had this bizarre superstitious hang-up over fortune cookies -- but it seems including random lottery numbers can only damage the fortune cookie's credibility. what is it saying, really? that you'll win the lottery if you play those numbers? that you'll win something? what about those other chumps you dined with that have different potential lottery picks? are you just supposed to be luckier than they are? it appears to me that the numbers are simply an admission that the whole thing's nothing but a crapshoot.
as you can probably gather, i've never been the biggest fan of fortune cookies or cookie fortunes, although appending 'in bed' to a fortune does do a remarkably impressive amount to boost the fortune's entertainment value and works well on a surprisingly regular basis.
case in point:
about a month ago, we dined at a vietnamese eatery and my sweetie got 'self-reliance is your path to success.'
i wonder who came up with that. you can't really arbitrarily add 'in bed' to anything else and have it both still make sense and be hilarious.
fortunes can, of course, be entertaining in and of themselves -- on occasion. i had a really good one in my wallet for a while, but unfortunately, i don't remember it and the lettering's since rubbed off.
i've gotten 'hell is paved with good intentions,' but my ultimate favourite is a fortune that DA told me about: 'you like chinese food.'
my sweetie still insists that it would be solid gold to start giving out cookies with fortunes reading 'you just ate cat.'
what are some of the better cookie fortunes (real ones!) y'all have encountered?
...
while staring at the massive grease spot that a dropped left-over shanghai noodle has imprinted upon my napkin, it occurred to me that it was kind of remarkable that the fortunes in fortune cookies didn't come out greased up and transclucent. i speculated that maybe the cookies didn't really have all that much grease in them -- that they were made entirely of, like, cornstarch and water -- which would explain why they're always flavourless and bone dry.
i consulted the great oracle of google to find this recipe for fortune cookies (which, like chop suey, was an american creation -- from some dude in LA, for crap's sake):
1 large egg
1/4 cup sugar
2 Tbsp. vegetable oil
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 to 2 Tbsp of water
Beat egg slightly. Add sugar and beat until very thick and smooth. Add oil to mixture. Add water and a little of the egg mixture to the cornstarch and stir until smooth; beat into egg mixture. Heat griddle to about 350 degrees. Drop a heaping teaspoonful of batter into the griddle. Then spread with a spoon into a cookie about 3 inches in diameter an d about 1/8 inch thick. Turn over to brown underside. Cook until cookies are light golden in color and lifts easily from the pan. Remove cookies one at a time from the griddle. Place a fortune paper in the center of the cookie and fold the cookie in half, pinching the edges together and folding down.
2 tablespoons of oil! i use that much to bake a batch of a dozen muffins which routinely leave grease spots on their muffin cups, and 1/4 cup cornstarch can't make that many fortune cookies.
anyway, when was it, exactly, when fortune cookies (more aptly called sweeping advice cookies or mangled proverb cookies) started including tacky lottery numbers? i'd venture to guess some time in the last ten years, 'cause i certainly don't remember them from my childhood.
i don't really understand the point, frankly. was there a marketing blitz that changed the landscape of fortune-cookie-dom forever? when one rogue manufacturer started offering new, improved cookies, 'now with lottery numbers!' to chinese and pseudochinese restauranteurs and all of its competitors had to follow suit? isn't not like regular folks regularly go out and buy fortune cookies to snack on.
cookie fortunes aren't meant to be taken seriously, of course -- although (digression) there was an awesome researcher at the national research council in ottawa, margaret, who was otherwise incredibly smart, witty and just plain cool, but had this bizarre superstitious hang-up over fortune cookies -- but it seems including random lottery numbers can only damage the fortune cookie's credibility. what is it saying, really? that you'll win the lottery if you play those numbers? that you'll win something? what about those other chumps you dined with that have different potential lottery picks? are you just supposed to be luckier than they are? it appears to me that the numbers are simply an admission that the whole thing's nothing but a crapshoot.
as you can probably gather, i've never been the biggest fan of fortune cookies or cookie fortunes, although appending 'in bed' to a fortune does do a remarkably impressive amount to boost the fortune's entertainment value and works well on a surprisingly regular basis.
case in point:
about a month ago, we dined at a vietnamese eatery and my sweetie got 'self-reliance is your path to success.'
i wonder who came up with that. you can't really arbitrarily add 'in bed' to anything else and have it both still make sense and be hilarious.
fortunes can, of course, be entertaining in and of themselves -- on occasion. i had a really good one in my wallet for a while, but unfortunately, i don't remember it and the lettering's since rubbed off.
i've gotten 'hell is paved with good intentions,' but my ultimate favourite is a fortune that DA told me about: 'you like chinese food.'
my sweetie still insists that it would be solid gold to start giving out cookies with fortunes reading 'you just ate cat.'
what are some of the better cookie fortunes (real ones!) y'all have encountered?
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
i locked myself out of my lab tonight.
'bril,' JJB would say if he were here.
then i would have to kill him.
...
a publisher sent the canadian undergraduate physics journal three books completely unsolicited. "In your review(s), please quote al ISBNs and list prices," says the enclosed slip.
one of the books they sent, Candid Science IV: Conversations with Famous Physicists (*snore*) costs US$118.
what kind of undergrad would voluntarily blow $118 US on a book called Candid Science IV?
'bril,' JJB would say if he were here.
then i would have to kill him.
...
a publisher sent the canadian undergraduate physics journal three books completely unsolicited. "In your review(s), please quote al ISBNs and list prices," says the enclosed slip.
one of the books they sent, Candid Science IV: Conversations with Famous Physicists (*snore*) costs US$118.
what kind of undergrad would voluntarily blow $118 US on a book called Candid Science IV?
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
i'm not entirely sure what got me thinking today about the hideous days of junior high, but for some reason, google triggered some sort of repressed memory of 'les actualités,' these current-event worksheets we had to fill out about once a month for social studies class through grades 7 to 9.
i remember spending hours in the public library scouring through newspapers to find obscure facts like the name of the deputy health minister of nova scotia at the time who may have been mentioned in some hidden news brief.
'les actualités' drove me to rabid frothing of the mouth; it wasn't that i didn't keep up with relevant current events, but the information the worksheet asked for was routinely irrelevant, with a few rare exceptions. i guess i wasn't as immersed in the news as i am now, though that's hardly surprising given my age then. the worksheets even made me ask my parents for an extremely ill-conceived subscription to Maclean's, which helped rarely if ever. the magazines piled up essentially untouched, and i, having neither the parents in high places with all the answers to the questions on the worksheet nor friends with such parents, was forced to wallow in my sheltered mediocrity.
i wonder if the ol' junior high still attempts this exercise, which by now -- evidently -- involves no more than the rote and mindless task of typing key words into google. and if they do still make the kids do 'les actualités,' i wonder if the students are learning just as little as i did back then.
i remember spending hours in the public library scouring through newspapers to find obscure facts like the name of the deputy health minister of nova scotia at the time who may have been mentioned in some hidden news brief.
'les actualités' drove me to rabid frothing of the mouth; it wasn't that i didn't keep up with relevant current events, but the information the worksheet asked for was routinely irrelevant, with a few rare exceptions. i guess i wasn't as immersed in the news as i am now, though that's hardly surprising given my age then. the worksheets even made me ask my parents for an extremely ill-conceived subscription to Maclean's, which helped rarely if ever. the magazines piled up essentially untouched, and i, having neither the parents in high places with all the answers to the questions on the worksheet nor friends with such parents, was forced to wallow in my sheltered mediocrity.
i wonder if the ol' junior high still attempts this exercise, which by now -- evidently -- involves no more than the rote and mindless task of typing key words into google. and if they do still make the kids do 'les actualités,' i wonder if the students are learning just as little as i did back then.
Sunday, May 09, 2004
ugh...
i think i might be getting sick.
my throat hurts, but not like it normally does when i get sick. it feels like someone's punched me in the larynx.
also, i'm exhausted. i've been sleeping all day.
god, i hope it's not mono.
ugh...
...
also: i hate tampa bay. they don't deserve to have a hockey team, much less be in the third round of the playoffs.
i think i might be getting sick.
my throat hurts, but not like it normally does when i get sick. it feels like someone's punched me in the larynx.
also, i'm exhausted. i've been sleeping all day.
god, i hope it's not mono.
ugh...
...
also: i hate tampa bay. they don't deserve to have a hockey team, much less be in the third round of the playoffs.
Saturday, May 08, 2004
there's a lingering smell in the apartment and i can't track it down. it's been pervading the space for the past week or so and i've been growing increasingly disturbed. the garbage's been taken out, the dishes done, the sink thoroughly drano'd but the smell's still here.
i don't think it's is getting stronger, although i fear i might be getting acclimatized to it. i'm paranoid that someone walking by our door will get bowled over by what they perceive to be the most repulsive of stenches. next thing i know, police will bust in to check that there aren't five decaying bodies in the suite.
speaking of which, i should really go roll those into the ocean soon.
anyway, it's one of those unidentifiable smells -- it's not dirty laundry, dog poo, or rotting food -- i don't think. it will be my mission this weekend to track it down and eliminate it. problem is, the sense of smell is so fickle; i've been trying to trace the source for days now, and each time i think the smell might be getting stronger, i lose it.
...
the supervisor invited me and my sweetie to wine and dine this prospective faculty member into coming here -- mostly so that my sweetie could explain his research to this dude. we went to this upscale-ish fish restaurant and i ordered an octopus-bacon-wrapped scallop appetizer. on the fancy-schmancy plate was the easily identifiable scallop as well as this mystery cube.
from the outside, it looked like agedashi tofu. i cut into it under the assumption that it was agedashi tofu.
it exploded in this spurt of brownish grey; some sort of gravy/sauce -- part of it landed right on the perfect white tablecloth.
yeah, i'm rad.
i don't even know how they made that thing. maybe they freeze the gravy into little cubes then deep fry them. *shrug*
point is, i disgraced myself in front of my supervisor, this new dude and his fiancee, and another prof and his architecture wife.
also, because i went to this dinner, i missed bowling for JW's birthday. but i did get a really really expensive meal for nothing.
i met JW and his crew a little later, when JW spilled beer on my foot from a gourd he got for his birthday. he's not going to feel that good tomorrow.
...
my simulations take 5 hours to run on my computer. this degree totally sucks.
i don't think it's is getting stronger, although i fear i might be getting acclimatized to it. i'm paranoid that someone walking by our door will get bowled over by what they perceive to be the most repulsive of stenches. next thing i know, police will bust in to check that there aren't five decaying bodies in the suite.
speaking of which, i should really go roll those into the ocean soon.
anyway, it's one of those unidentifiable smells -- it's not dirty laundry, dog poo, or rotting food -- i don't think. it will be my mission this weekend to track it down and eliminate it. problem is, the sense of smell is so fickle; i've been trying to trace the source for days now, and each time i think the smell might be getting stronger, i lose it.
...
the supervisor invited me and my sweetie to wine and dine this prospective faculty member into coming here -- mostly so that my sweetie could explain his research to this dude. we went to this upscale-ish fish restaurant and i ordered an octopus-bacon-wrapped scallop appetizer. on the fancy-schmancy plate was the easily identifiable scallop as well as this mystery cube.
from the outside, it looked like agedashi tofu. i cut into it under the assumption that it was agedashi tofu.
it exploded in this spurt of brownish grey; some sort of gravy/sauce -- part of it landed right on the perfect white tablecloth.
yeah, i'm rad.
i don't even know how they made that thing. maybe they freeze the gravy into little cubes then deep fry them. *shrug*
point is, i disgraced myself in front of my supervisor, this new dude and his fiancee, and another prof and his architecture wife.
also, because i went to this dinner, i missed bowling for JW's birthday. but i did get a really really expensive meal for nothing.
i met JW and his crew a little later, when JW spilled beer on my foot from a gourd he got for his birthday. he's not going to feel that good tomorrow.
...
my simulations take 5 hours to run on my computer. this degree totally sucks.
Thursday, May 06, 2004
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
MOMENTUM, it seems, isn't completely dead. however, my hope that it will return in the near future is no more than a pipe dream. they're still trying to find a publisher and a managing editor, apparently, though they don't seem to be trying all that hard. CM says that she believes in 'synchronicity' that will bring the right person into the position at the right time.
hmm...
ahh well.
we had our first MOMpops meeting yesterday -- the first festival is coming up in just two and a half weeks! i threw out a few ideas: rhythm jam, wild blackberry jam-making, plant swap...but i don't think i'm going to be terribly deeply involved with this project. i can't afford to take on any additional commitments. i'll go to the event, though, and encourage people i know to go. they're going to try to have pedal-powered sound systems, art jams, dancing, a free store, barter booth, a bunch of other hippie stuff...
they're also putting together a cheap little zine to hand out at the event. i offered to help out, but i don't think i'll do much for it after all. it doesn't do enough to quench my MOMENTUM withdrawl and i hesitate to put my name onto something that i know will be hastily and shoddily done, even if it is for a good cause. the others seem really excited and passionate about it, so we'll see how things turn out. i'll have a review of the event after the first MOMpop.
hmm...
ahh well.
we had our first MOMpops meeting yesterday -- the first festival is coming up in just two and a half weeks! i threw out a few ideas: rhythm jam, wild blackberry jam-making, plant swap...but i don't think i'm going to be terribly deeply involved with this project. i can't afford to take on any additional commitments. i'll go to the event, though, and encourage people i know to go. they're going to try to have pedal-powered sound systems, art jams, dancing, a free store, barter booth, a bunch of other hippie stuff...
they're also putting together a cheap little zine to hand out at the event. i offered to help out, but i don't think i'll do much for it after all. it doesn't do enough to quench my MOMENTUM withdrawl and i hesitate to put my name onto something that i know will be hastily and shoddily done, even if it is for a good cause. the others seem really excited and passionate about it, so we'll see how things turn out. i'll have a review of the event after the first MOMpop.
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
Monday, May 03, 2004
american truck-driver thomas hamill escaped the captivity of iraqi kidnappers this weekend after three weeks of being held hostage. he ran toward a group of american soldiers shouting, apparently, and they took him out of the area and gave him medical care.
gosh, wasn't it so fortunate that hamill is white?
can you imagine what might have happened if, say, fadi fadel, rifat mohammad rifat or naji al kuwaiti came running toward a troop of american soldiers, shouting?
gosh, wasn't it so fortunate that hamill is white?
can you imagine what might have happened if, say, fadi fadel, rifat mohammad rifat or naji al kuwaiti came running toward a troop of american soldiers, shouting?
Saturday, May 01, 2004
combatting lethargy...
went for a good bike ride for the first time in months. first invigourating exercise i've had in months. god, i'm out of shape.
i want to do critical mass again in june, though. i'm hoping it'll be huge like last year.
...
on tuesday night, i get to find out whether my beloved MOMENTUM magazine is dead for good. it went on 'hiatus' after the october/november issue (which featured my sustainable funerals article) and my fear was that it would never come back. CM and AW, who edited MOMENTUM, are starting up this new venture, MOMpops, which is a series of free one-day festivals to bring together people and families in the community. we're have a brainstorming session for it tuesday, when, presumably, it will be made a little less ambiguous whether this is the triumphant relaunch of the great publication or a celebratory funeral.
oh, MOMENTUM. i enjoyed writing for it because it wasn't overly demanding. i think that with school and everything else going on, a bi-monthly sets the perfect freelancing pace for me. also, i could write just about anything for MOM, and the people i met through it are just such an awesomely diverse and quirky group of hippies. i guess i should try to get off my ass and find someone else to freelance for, but on the other hand, this whole thesis thing should probably take precedence.
stupid thesis. i just hate you so much...
went for a good bike ride for the first time in months. first invigourating exercise i've had in months. god, i'm out of shape.
i want to do critical mass again in june, though. i'm hoping it'll be huge like last year.
...
on tuesday night, i get to find out whether my beloved MOMENTUM magazine is dead for good. it went on 'hiatus' after the october/november issue (which featured my sustainable funerals article) and my fear was that it would never come back. CM and AW, who edited MOMENTUM, are starting up this new venture, MOMpops, which is a series of free one-day festivals to bring together people and families in the community. we're have a brainstorming session for it tuesday, when, presumably, it will be made a little less ambiguous whether this is the triumphant relaunch of the great publication or a celebratory funeral.
oh, MOMENTUM. i enjoyed writing for it because it wasn't overly demanding. i think that with school and everything else going on, a bi-monthly sets the perfect freelancing pace for me. also, i could write just about anything for MOM, and the people i met through it are just such an awesomely diverse and quirky group of hippies. i guess i should try to get off my ass and find someone else to freelance for, but on the other hand, this whole thesis thing should probably take precedence.
stupid thesis. i just hate you so much...
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