jesus crap.

what gave me the bright idea that i could be a home-owner, anyway?

i'm getting old.

we'd been talking about it for some time. it'd be good to get some equity. get a home before the housing costs really go nuts thanks to the olympics. if we have to move to ottawa temporarily, we could rent out. we want to be back here, anyway.

right?

right!?

fuck.

neither of us has time for this. i'm not even going to have an income come september -- what makes me think i'd even be given a mortgage?

anyway, we figured that, since neither of us had time for this, it'd be easiest to start close to home. 'next time a for-sale sign goes up for a suite on our building, we should check it out,' i suggested. my sweetie agreed.

but we missed one opportunity, then another, and another...

now, there is a suite on the 3rd floor of our building: 2-level, 1 bedroom, south-facing. price tag: $199,900.

ugh. i think i'm going to be sick. owning a home, eh? so bourgeois.

i e-mailed the realtor, and assuming it hasn't been snapped up already, we should be taking a look at it. i have two and a half months to get research results, write up a thesis and somehow find some sort of sustaining income in september. why am i thinking about this now!?

somebody please give me some words of encouragement here. tell me i'm doing the right thing. oh god. i'm going to be so fucking poor.